BZ: How this piece unfolded for Jeannie to share with you.
Email from Jeannie:
CommUNITY is the pulse of life. I’ve been very blessed in my experience. There are many thriving communities that I am a part of, in flesh and Spirit. My first community, my family is a very loving, caring, thoughtful, fun and intelligent community. From there I have church (Catholic, then non-denominational Christian), school (2 years Catholic, then public), and neighborhood, etc…
As a first born, female, born to a couple of high school sweethearts who HAD to get married, I experienced some drama. We were fed, clothed and sheltered, but struggled. My dad worked very hard, held more than one job at a time, and provided for us. ( Dad became a successful business owner before he passed) Mom worked at home caring for us (what turned out to be 4 kids). She is a wonderful homemaker! She gardened cooked and sewed from scratch. She could do anything (painting, wallpaper, and so on) I am blessed to be so much like her. She read to us and took us to the library. To this day, I LOVE to read.
Years later (Conceived on my 18th birthday) I found myself in the same situation. (Only he was nearly 9 years older than me) Of course I felt obligated to do the same. (even though I wanted to break up with him) Being a “good Catholic ” I married him. I did it out of fear. What a wonderful way to start a life together –NOT!
My name means Grace.I was born on the 5th day of September. The number 5 means grace as well. I have always been very loving and obedient I wanted, more than anything, to be pleasing. I wanted to keep the peace. I feel like, being like that has saved me. Even though being “obedient ” has nearly killed me, I ultimately live in and through my heart. In living a loving, forgiving life, I have survived the control and abuse of my experience. I allow grace and love to flow to me and through me. I know that I have been a co-creator in my experience. For a long time I had no idea that was true. I felt like a victim. I suppose you could say that I was. After all, the beliefs I grew up with were a contributor.
I have been very open-minded and have actively ,continually, learned, through reading, watching, listening, and engaging. I have followed my heart. At times I questioned my beliefs. I opened my eyes, and took responsibility for my own actions. I have the courage to see the reality of what is, and embrace it. I see the paradox, the irony, the way I created my life through my thoughts and FEELINGS. That was a tough one at first, because I played the role of victim (and eventually the survivor). I know from experience that when I stay in a place of UNCONDITIONAL LOVE FOR ALL OF LIFE , I AM in HEAVEN.
In my heart, all are ONE.
I AM UNITY
LOVE AND LIGHT
BZ: Email sent the next morning